The Urine Incident 2: A confession

My name is Travis Meidell and this is my confession.

To understand the grasp of this new Urine Incident, you must first know the story of the original. The original Urine Incident occurred years ago, around the time I was 12. We did a scout event where we went to the Bountiful Bubble, which was the local swimming pool. They called it the bubble because every winter they would inflate this giant bubble over the pool so you could keep swimming in the winter. It was a really great way to have both an indoor and outdoor pool.

Anyway, for a scout meeting we went to the pool and swam around, it was a lot of fun. Afterwards, we went into the dressing room, and you could either change in the open or wait for one of three or four private stalls to change in. With such a big group of scouts and no one wanting to be naked in front of their peers there was a bit of a line to get in a stall. When I finally did, I really had to go pee but I wasn’t about to give up this stall for nothing so I did the only logical thing. I just peed in the corner of the stall. I mean you have to realize that the stall was full of water already. People changed in there all day long and it puddled up quite a bit so to my young brain, it was basically like peeing in a pool. Ugh, no justification of this action will ever sound right.

Well I avoided the puddle as I changed and headed out onto other things. A short time later I heard screaming coming from the stalls. My brother, the other Travis, came flying out of the stall I had just been in. “Someone peed in here!”, he was shouting. Everyone gathered around to hear Travis’ tale of how he came into the stall and was dancing and splashing in the warm water until he realized the water shouldn’t be warm. A quick sniff confirmed everything, he was dancing and splashing in urine.

Everyone in scouts quickly began trying to deduce who had been in that stall but frankly no one was really sure. I quickly claimed to have been in another stall to cover my tracks. No one seemed suspicious. The other Travis washed his feet and soon we all forgot the whole incident. Everyone except me.

My guilt haunted me. Days turned into weeks. Weeks into months. Months into years but always in the back of mind, I knew that Travis had danced in my urine. When we 15, I asked the other Travis, “what he would do if I had been the one to have peed in the stall?” This should have been a dead give-away to my crime, I mean who recounts things like that three years later but Travis did not pick up on this and jokingly said, “I guess, I’d kill you.” Clearly, his wound was still fresh. I quickly laughed and said, “well it’s a good thing I didn’t do it then.” The other Travis, ever oblivious, accepted this fact.

Two more years passed. I now had my drivers license. I was dating girls. I had a part-time job. Yet I was still haunted. So finally one day, I confessed. Frankly, I don’t remember the actual confession much. I’ve blocked the memory from my brain but I know it happened. The other Travs responded as anyone might respond to discovering they danced in their brother’s urine five years earlier. He laughed. We both laughed. I think there was some relief there. If you’re going to dance in someone’s urine, wouldn’t you prefer it be your brother’s?

This story has been told and retold many times since. The other Travis seems incredibly amused by the tale now and likes to recount it to my embarrassment. It’s weird that this story embarrasses me. I can openly confess to pooping my pants in a public place but the Urine Incident is one of those stories that really makes me uncomfortable. Probably because it’s my fault. I couldn’t help but poop my pants. I was sick and trapped but the Urine Incident was entirely me. I don’t have a really good reason for not holding my pee another five minutes… plus I was like 12 years old. That’s not exactly young. Though, the further I get from it, the easier it is to tell. Hence my confession here.

But the reality is this post isn’t about the original, it’s about the sequel. The new Urine Incident occurred two days ago. Simon woke up early and I went to get him but first, I had business. I blindly stumbled out of bed and headed into the bathroom, leaving the light off because, it was too bright. What I was about to do could be done in the dark… or so I thought.

Standing in front the bowl, I began to pee but something was wrong. There was no splash. Uh-oh, I was hitting the edge of the bowl. I quickly veered to right and heard the familiar splashing. Now don’t go thinking I am slob, once I was done, I grabbed some toilet paper and wiped up the bowl and what not. I could have done more due diligence but it was 6:15 in the morning.

A few hours later, I was getting out of the shower and because Tia and I were headed somewhere together, she was going to get right in after me. So while I was standing there putting on deodorant and what not, Tia came in and went to hop in the shower. But right before she got in she said the dreaded words, “Oh you must have splashed over here.” I turned and looked at her. “What?” She repeated. “You must have splashed over here, from the shower, because it’s wet.” Tia was standing right next to the toilet. A place, I hadn’t been since getting out of the shower. “Ohh… yeah, I- I guess so.” I grabbed some toilet paper and wiped it up. Tia smiled and said thanks and hopped in the shower.

I walked into the next room to get dressed and it returned. That guilt. That terrible feeling that once again, someone had unknowingly splashed in my urine. How long would I have to keep this secret this time? How many years would pass before I’d make some joke about it only to recoil in fear and denial. NO. Not again. This time was going to be different.

Two days passed. I needed to be free of this nagging guilt. So here I am making that confession for the whole world to see.

Tia, it wasn’t shower water you stepped in. It was most likely a 7 am pee. I would have told you right then but frankly, you were getting right in the shower and I’ve never been very good at confessing pee-based sins. So please forgive me. I won’t pee in the dark anymore. 

Whew that feels good. Now it’s on Tia to read this.

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: